IcyFrost

We went to reviews yesterday and was happy that our baby is healthy and ok. While Waiting for our turn to see the gyn my wife was so nervous worrying that there’s something wrong to our baby. I told her everything is going to be alright. Why does she always have to think of the negative. I know it’s a big problem to her but there’s nothing I can do to make her think positive. She has always been like that, always anticipate the most negative since day 1 I know her. I hope she can change her mind set. To me I always feel that one should never ever worry about anything until it’s proven it’s already happen or happening. Why worry and make yourself miserable for something that don’t exist or may not exist, I just cannot understand. It’s not as if there’s any physical clue that it may bla bla bla you know…… all that is worries over nothing.

During the Visit the gyn, the gyn suppose to show us the video of the Operation process. but it’s not ready yet so he show us some of the pictures taken. One of the pictures show a view of the liver. with some tissue attach to it. A spin of cold sweat goes down my spine when I saw that. It’s just a thin tissue attach to it. I think it’s some vein and white color stuff that look like those fats on the pork you see in the market. I begin to imagine what happen if the doc accidentally use a bit more strength and injure or break the link to the liver, what’s going to happen? The thought of that really scare me.

I begin to feel that going to operation is really putting your live on someones else hand. All that someone need to do is just accidentally cut a thin vein from your organ and that’s it. You are gone. So being a surgeon must be very very careful and cannot afford to have any slightest mistake or NG. There’s no turning back and try again. There can only be one take. Any slightest mistake make by the surgeon can cause you your life if not permanent suffering. The image of the liver is still printed vividly in my mind now.

I still remember the first thing that come out of my wife mouth is “Hey this thing look like pork liver” before she realize that’s actually her liver. I can’t help laughing when I hear that.

It’s already 14 March, 7 days after my wife have taken out her cyst. Last night I see that she can already get up from bed easily and it’s good to see her getting much better everyday. I have met one of my cousin yesterday while on the way to work and we do chit chat a bit. She said that she too has cyst when she’s pregnant. In fact she have two. One smaller and the other one is about 10 cm in size. She disclose that she didn’t go to operation because her cysts cause no pain and her gyn is quite confident that the cyst will go away when she’s 3 or 4 month pregnant. Actually my wife gyn also wanted to wait until my wife is 3 to 4 months pregnant. Avoid taking it out if it cause no pain. But if it cause a lot of pain then take it out. Was thinking won’t it be better if the cyst cause no pain and disappear by itself. Save all our problem. But I guess no choice. Where money and Health is concern, Health always comes first.

My Wife was discharge from the hospital on 9 Aug 2007. She was still very weak on that day and every movement she make hurt the wound. But still able to sit up and walk slowly with great effort. Compare to the very next day after the operation, I think she has already taken a great leap and she’s healing fast. As I’m proceeding to pay the bill at the lobby of Gleneagles hospital. I was thinking how much will the bill be. I was right, the bill is about 5k plus, after the CPF rebate. We need to pay about 3k plus. At least we still got some savings to cover those cost. The Gyn give her 2 weeks of MC (Medical Cert) till 23 March to rest at home.

Went we are at home later in the afternoon, my wife realize how important it is to save for a raining day. The first day she just do nothing and sleep the whole day. More activity on the second day. She begin to walk around the house and sit on the living room watching TV.

I called home just now and she told me that she has already feeling much better. But her occasion feeling to vomit has hurt her healing wound. She has been trying to refrain from taking the pain killer and medicine that prevent vomit worrying that it may affect our baby in some way. So I tell her just take the medicine when you think it’s necessary and don’t force yourself too much. I don’t want her to be so miserable.

It’s tough this few days but I think it’s worth it so long as both my wife and child is ok.

Went IPPT ( Individual Physical Proficiency Test ) today. While our OC is doing a head count I seems to hear my phone ringing as it’s just in a paper bag not very far away behind me. Thought of ignoring the phone call but something inside me is calling me to pick up that call. So I just walk away and pick up my call while we have not fall out. I think re-service like us don’t bother.

Saw the number is from my home, first thing that comes to my mind is ( Shit, that Ovarian Cysts in her stomach must be causing her a lot of pain ). I pick up the call and my father in law immediately ask me if I can take leaves and come back immediately. I don’t know what happen until he pass the phone to my wife and she told me that she’s in great pain at her right Ovarian Cysts. Ask me to go back immediately and bring her to the hospital.

Immediately I ask my OC for permission. He called our PNS office immediately and fortunately I’m able to leave. I guess they are also family man so they understand. But I have to get a letter from the gyn to prove that I’m not lying ( Which is not a problem as I’m genuine case ).

I call my wife as I’m walking out and set to meet her in the hospital. I reach first as I’m much nearer. By the time she reach, the pain has already subdue greatly by itself and she’s still able to walk. Once the gyn arrive he wanted to take the thing out immediately. The gyn briefly explain what going to happen. He said he will try to use a technique call laparoscopic where he only need 3 key hole cut. If it’s not suitable then he will use another technique call laparotomy where a more serious operation which involves a much larger cut across the top of the pubic hairline. The nurse suggest that she rest in the hospital since the next available slot to the ops room is at 7pm. While waiting in the room I can feel the fear in my wife. She was so scare that her body temperature went up and feels like slight fever. Well there’s nothing I can do but just console her.

Time pass by soon. The nurse came and push her down to the ops room at 1830 hrs and I think she’s trying very hard to hide her fear. I thought of going home and bath but change my mind as I was told that the ops should finish in 1.5-2 hrs time. I calculate the time and predicted that she should return to her room by latest 21:00 hrs. although the visiting hour ends at 2100 hrs. I can just wait till I’m told to leaves. So I just took a walk around a nearby shopping mall and went back to wait as I’m also quite worried too.

Her eldest brother came with her parent at 20:30 hrs. She came back nearly 9 but I see that she’s still in coma stage. Soon she woke up and we begin to talk and chit chat. I can see that she’s pale and weak. I have to wet her lips many time as she’s very thirsty but can’t drink or eat anything till next morning. My heart hurts to see her in a state like this. Tears nearly drop from the edge of my eyes.

As the Doc didn’t come to the ward, I couldn’t ask if there’s anything about our baby. So I think I just have to wait till next morning. Hopefully our baby is still around.

We went back to our gyn on the following Fri 2 Mar 2007. We waited for 1 hr as the gyn was having an operation and there’s a delay. We are the 3rd on the list and finally it’s our turn. I was hoping that her Right Ovarian Cysts shrink even if it’s only a bit. But in fact it grew by 4mm. It measure 110 mm now. My heart sunk. But the gyn remain hopeful and call use to come back next week.

My mother-in-law suggest my wife to see a nun. Just no harm trying, you know. I don’t actually believe in this things but well, I guess I have no other choice, just try and see how and hope for better. Initially I expect to hear the same old stories, Pray, do kind things etc… She actually say that the cyst is actually cause by the food my wife eat. So she suggest that my wife stop eating any food that’s fried, Junk Food ( Potato Chips etc… ), Pepper, Any food that has chili. She say those food will encourage the cyst to grow. In another words she encourage my wife to eat healthy, and the cyst will shrink and go away. And also switch to eat Oat Meal instead of instant noodles before sleep if we feel hungry. For the first time I find that nun words make sense. So now I’m trying to stop my wife from eating those food, but I know it’s hard. She has been eating those for as long as I know her. I would have stop her or at least reduce her food habit greatly if I know that it would cause her so much pain in future.

For Now I just hope that it will reduce in size on our next visit to the gyn on 10 Mar. I really hope that she can avoid the ops at all cost.